Batman: We Own the Knight (mee-OWWwwwwww - Catwoman Report Card is up!)

Gotham Gazette November 10th, 2008



Not a Joke By Roger Mortimer

A traffic jam on the mainland highway, caused by many leaving their homes in the seemingly condemned Pink District

Yesterday the Joker issued an ultimatum. We kill our newly elected Mayor Thorne, or he will release Sarin gas, the same gas used in the deadly Aum Shinrikyo Subway attacks in Tokyo thirteen years ago. He has given us a deadline of tonight before he’ll release it. While he originally claimed to release it in Gotham and Blackgate penitentiary, he has since switched the location to the Pink District.

This is the second time the Joker has issued an ultimatum. The first time he said he’d bomb our schools if we didn’t close them down. We closed them down, he didn’t bomb the schools. By track record it would seem that he keeps his word, and would lend to us wanting to comply. But asking for regular citizens of Gotham to murder instead of having a day without school is different. While the Joker has made unproven claims of Thorne’s corruption, either way Thorne has yet to do anything that would deserve his death. It is suspicious that both of his candidates in the race were publically assassinated by the same man, who has twice claimed to have been paid by Thorne to do so, and has left Thorne alone. While he made claims of trying to kill Thorne, he has yet to actually do so. While he did raid the Wayne fundraiser, he let Thorne escape and didn’t bother trying to run after him, but instead went through great efforts to kill the other mayors, both ramming through a police barricade and kidnapping one under high security. Thorne has, in a way, benefited from the Joker’s rampage. However, I’d like to remind readers that there is no proof and this paper is making no accusation of Mayor Thorne.

The Pink District has been hit hard by the news, as thousands flee the area in response. There is no official evacuation going on, the citizens are simply taking it upon themselves to leave the area. Businesses are being closed down as the owners and customers leave the area for hotels or friends in other districts.

“It’s insane. A domestic Terrorist threatens to release Sarin Gas in our home, but when we want to leave we have to leave by ourselves? There is no government aid?” said Matt Hawkins, a father of three who lived in the Pink District. “I had to load our car up with whatever I could, but almost everything is still left. There are looters on the streets taking advantage of this, breaking into houses stealing the valuables, knowing the police have too much on their hands to bother. It’s chaos.”

While Mayor Thorne has not issues an evacuation of the Pink District, probably out of doubt that the Joker told the truth, he has announced that the Red Cross has agreed to help Gotham, and that the National Guard is helping to secure several locations. His office also released the symptoms of exposure to Sarin, as well as supposed antidotes. He also announced that it’s best if the citizens of Gotham stay to high ground.

The location of the Mayor is currently disclosed, so there could be no interview with him nor could we inform him of this article beforehand to allow him to state his own viewpoint. Specifics were also not announced, such as exactly what the Red Cross and the National Guard would be doing.

“Personally, and I just mean this personally” said Jerome Sheperd, a businessman in the Pink District, “I just mean personally I have to wonder what the Mayor thinks his job his. He’s suppose to help protect us. He wasn’t fairly elected, I mean who were we suppose to elect? He was the only goddamn candidate that survived. It’s just fishy to me. And now we’re all suppose to die so he can save his own skin? It’s ridiculous. And I just mean this personally, but god save me I hope someone kills him. I’m a pacifist, but when it’s one corrupt person or thousands, then it’s an easy choice.”

Jerome’s view is common amongst those fleeing from the Pink District, though it is not so common elsewhere.

“We can’t bow down to terrorists” said Kate Walker, who lives in the Brown District. “We kill a mayor and the Joker would have turned all of us into his personal hitmen. So the Pink District dies as a result. Good riddance. The people there are basically animals. They just rob and murder and ****. The Mayor is a good man and shouldn’t have to be threatened by this.”

Sarin Gas is a nerve agent, labeled as a weapon of mass destruction by the United Nations in UN Resolution 687. It works by attacking the nervous system of living organisms. It’s an extremely potent irreversible cholinesterase inhibitor. Initial symptoms are a runny nose, tightness in the chest and constriction of the pupils. Soon after, the victim has difficulty breathing and experiences nausea and drooling. As the victim continues to lose control of bodily functions, the victim vomits, defecates and urinates. This phase is followed by twitching and jerking. Ultimately, the victim becomes comatose and suffocates in a series of convulsive spasms. Sarin has a high volatility relative to similar nerve agents. Even vapor concentrations immediately penetrate the skin. People who absorb a non-lethal dose but do not receive immediate appropriate medical treatment may suffer permanent neurological damage. Death may follow in one minute after direct ingestion of about 0.01 milligram per kilogram of body weight if antidotes are not immediately administered.



The Galactic Disappearance By Vicki Vale

The empty foundations, where the Galaxy Credit Union once stood

On November 2nd, terrorists working with the Black Mask took heavily armed vans to rob Gotham First National Bank and the East Coast Banking Center. Only a couple of days ago on the 8th, Antoino “Bane the Breaker” Marcos tore the People’s Bank apart, single handedly murdering everyone inside and making away with over thirty-five million dollars. But as bankers, tellers, and customers woke up this morning to go to work at the Galaxy Credit Union in Pinewood Place, they recognized that the entire bank had disappeared.

All that was left of the GCU, located just down the street from the Knight’s Center, was a slim margin of lowest base of the building’s foundation – the walls, the roof, the rooms inside, the vault… the building was stolen in its entirety. GCPD investigators claim that the outgoing alarms and security connections were severed sometime in the middle of the night, though they claim that a majority of the work to move the building could not have been done in one night. Apparently, the bank was stolen right under our nose, plainly in front of the public eye, the work disguised as reconstructive maintenance and construction work to repair damage from the riots that broke out earlier in the week.

Sitting on the concrete foundation where the bank once stood were the four security guards who were on duty protecting the facility, all tied together, gagged, blindfolded, and drugged out of their minds. Black spray-paint under where they sat read the statement, “Impossibility is an invitation, not a declaration,” and it was signed with a childlike drawing of a cat’s face, similar to the newly vandalized appearance of the Bat-, or should I now say Cat-, signal. Written on the hand of Jonathan Lunati, one of the four policemen found at the scene, were the words “cute kid” and “get some health insurance.” Upon interview, the man shyly admitted that he had no insurance card to show us, but did have a picture of his young daughter in his wallet; missing, however, was his security keycard.

The monetary value of the contents of the vault reaches over twenty million dollars, but the real cost to the city will be the replacement of the entire banking facility. Construction will have to commence immediately, yet we can only assume that somewhere in the city, the bank that must be rebuilt is hidden where one deviously expert thief will never have to wait in line at the ATM again.


Phoenix Pharmaceuticals Targeted By Stanton Kiel

An aerial view of the chaos in downtown Gotham

Earlier today over the radio, the Penny Plunderer announced that he had left a present for Bruce Wayne and Dr. Melvin Taransky at Phoenix Pharmaceuticals. That present was another bombed L-Train, with massive amounts of pennies found scattered over the scene and in the train itself.

Well-places explosives were used to knock the train off its rails and into the Phoenix Pharmaceuticals building. It crashed into the third and second storeys. A nearby officer, Spencer Wilcox, immediately evacuated the passengers on the rear of the train who survived the impact.

Rescue workers appeared on the scene immediately, however things were still looking to get worse as it seemed the badly damages third floor would collapse onto the second, killing the workers trapped inside by the rubble. Some cars of the train were hanging from the tracks down into the building and the passengers inside were trapped.

Then Batman appeared, and completely contrary to what one would believe about him due to treatment of a DeLorean yesterday, he must be a bit of a car collector as he arrived in a fresh Batmobile despite one being destroyed very recently by The Joker.

He put the Batmobile to use right away, riding along the tracks and attaching cables to the train. The Batmobile then fired its jet-like boosters and the train slowly creaked back up onto the tracks, allowing the survivors trapped in the suspended cars to evacuate.

Batman the rushed into the building along a zipline and began lowering survivors down it. Just as the ceiling was collapsing with Batman inside, he leapt out carrying three survivors and lowered them to the ground safely using the zipline. Batman flatly stated that those three survivors he carried out were the last in the building, then he disappeared.

Police Comissioner Jim Gordon was on the scene organizing the rescue efforts afterward.

When asked for comment, Ronald Phoenix stated, "I've been advised against speaking indepth with the media, however I will say that if this was an attack on the good things my company is trying to do -- to the person that did this, you're nothing but a speed bump."

Recent events call to mind the question. "What's happening at Phoenix Pharmaceuticals that the public doesn't know about?" Bane the Breaker accused them of being one of the companies that produced Venom, a lethally addictive drug. The mysterious firing of the brilliant Dr. Melvin Taransky also comes to mind. And now they've been officially targeted. Does the Penny Plunderer have a vendetta against Phoenix, like Bane seemed to, or was it just wanton destruction against a valuable target?


D.A. Incites Gang War? By Alexander Knox

The inside of Samovar, as seen after the fire had been put out

Around 7:30 last night, a tall man with an Italian-American accent entered Samovar. Samovar is a restaurant patronized mostly by Eastern Europeans, especially members of the gang run by "the Chechen". As such, the tall man's presense here was unusual.

His next actions were even more so. He approached Jirka Brodsky and Lomy Slegr, two member's of the Chechen's gang, and began demanding information on Gotham District Attorney Harvey Dent, who recently disappeared under mysterious circumstances. The conversation was heated from the start, and it quickly escalated into violence. One of the two gang members attacked the tall man, but he was able to knock both onto the floor before making a quick exit.

Seconds afterward, a small explosion shook the restaurant, splattering a Napalm-like substance over the restaurant and many of the patrons. Six people died, including the two gang members. One man is hospitalized in critical condition, suffering from widespread second degree burns. Many more suffered non-life-threatening injuries.

Within minutes, the GCFD had arrived, and the fire was put out almost twenty minutes after it began. However, by that time the Samovar was little more than a burnt out husk, and the lives of six Gotham residents had been burnt out as well.

Police are asking anyone with information about the perpatrator to come forward. He is described as a tall, medium-build man. He is caucasian with a slight tan, wavy black hair, and brown eyes. His weight is estimated at around 180 pounds, and he stands about 6'1" tall. The terror that Gotham feels right now will not go away unless Gothamites are strong enough to act against it.


Today's Population: 5,590,040

Hello, people of Gotham.

As your police commissioner I'd like to take this time to speak specifically the residents of the pink district that have been forced to leave their homes. I want you all to know that it is my top priority, as it is Mayor Thorne's, to ensure your safety and well-being during this disaster.

We are sending a large force of cops and soon, the national guard to the pink district. Your homes will be safe and your belongings will be safe. We will also try to protect the citizens who have chosen to stay in their homes. With the help of ThorneCorp's research we were able to find an antidote to the effects of the Sarin gas. Samples will be passed out to any citizen that needs them.

I am also persuading Mayor Thorne to officially evacuate the Pink district and provide aid for families and individuals forced to flee. Rest assured that the safest decision is to leave the area for the time being.

As always, keep safe Gotham.

November 11th, 2008


Welcome back to WCRX, this is Louis Tarnidge, and you're with me on the Cold Room.

Sorry about the delay in our programme today, but abrupt power spikes knocked out our broadcasting center. All the same, we're back for more intellectual discussion and proper music.

Many may have noticed the lack of a Gazette today. I now have, in my possession, an e-mail from Gazette editor Douglas Foss that he's asked me to read on the airwaves.


Hello to Gotham City. Many of you know my name. Today, on the eleventh of November, I'm afraid the Gazette failed to go to press.

There are a myriad of reasons for this, but chiefly among them is that our distribution center, in fact, runs through the pink district. Not one of our drivers was found willing to enter the area. For this, I can only apologize. If Gotham was the same small port down it once was, I can assure you I'd have driven in there myself to distribute our word with my own bare hands and by foot if necessary.

However, we still have a responsibility to report the news, and so I shall.

By the time you hear this, it will likely be evening. There may have been a sarin gas attack by then. However, I find the Joker to be a man defined by ruthlessness, and moreso by cowardice. As such, I am going to report the incident under the assumption that there has been, in fact, no such attack.

I think this proves the Joker to be what we've always assumed him -- a terrorist. A man trying to inspire fear and chaos. And regardless of whether he may do so, he remains a predator lurking in the shadows and playing upon our insecurities. This man is no supervillain. None of these vermin are, they are merely flamboyant about the ways by which they execute selfish and evil deeds. Make little of the fact that the Joker defeated the Batman; the Batman should not be deified, he is merely a man that took the weight of this city's failures upon his shoulders.

In lesser but equally baffling news, the Gotham City Zoo -- near Wayne Botanical Garden -- was apparently raided last night. Two security guards were found unconscious, and a third one dead by a broken neck. The animals were released shortly thereafter, confusing the remaining security staff and masking the likely culprit. Confirmed missing, thus far, are several hyenas and at least one lion.

Thank you for your perseverence, Gotham City, and as always, stay strong.



Powerful stuff. What do you think of Foss's insights into the Joker? On this latest unusual heist in what has become a constant string of unlikely crimes, attacks, and heists? Where is our city headed? You know the number.

Penny Plunderer said:

Now now, a woman shouldn't be talking like that. Very unlady like. Nowhere in particular has tickled my fancy for a good fighting spot, yet. But once I find a spot, I'll let you know. And I doubt that you could beat me, especially with some of the new weapons I have gotten ahold of. I'll chop you up until you've become nothing more than Kibbles-N-Bits and feed you to your precious cats.

Click to expand...

I'm calling in to remind Penny Plunderer that I'm ready whenever he is, and that not being able to find a "good fighting spot" is a terribly weak excuse to avoid putting your money where your mouth is. Instead of ducking away from the fight or trying to pick the location and then rig it with explosives, why don't you just call me at this number and we can haggle on a place to get this over with.

Evil Eye said:

In lesser but equally baffling news, the Gotham City Zoo -- near Wayne Botanical Garden -- was apparently raided last night. Two security guards were found unconscious, and a third one dead by a broken neck. The animals were released shortly thereafter, confusing the remaining security staff and masking the likely culprit. Confirmed missing, thus far, are several hyenas and at least one lion.

Click to expand...

And whoever had the bright idea to mess with more animals: you're not doing yourself any favors. I'll find you.

20:00



GOTHAM TONIGHT

The camera opens on Mike Engel, who sits in his studio with Commissioner Gordon.


ENGEL: "Welcome to Gotham Tonight. As always, I'm your host, Mike Engel. Today, we have the privilage to interview the newly-appointed Commissioner James Gordon. Good to see you again, Commissioner."

He offers a handshake, which Gordon accepts.

GORDON: "It's a pleasure."

ENGEL: "It seems we found the right man for the job, and your promotion couldn't have come at a better time. Tell me, Commissioner, what has been the game plan for the pink district evacuation between yourself and Mayor Thorne?"

GORDON: "We both agreed that it would be best to evacuate the pink district quickly, just to be safe. Then to keep the district together we sent in a large force of men to keep crime under control so that people would be willing to leave."

GORDON: "Thanks to research at thornecorp we have a large supply of antidote for the sarin gas that we then handed out to those still in the district. Should the Joker carry out his threats the people of Gotham will be safe."

ENGEL: "What do you make of the fact that we haven't been attacked? Do you think the Joker is becoming all bark, as Douglas Foss suggested?"

GORDON: "I think it's possible. He likes to spread fear and he really doesn't seem to care whether or not he has to kill people to do so."

ENGEL: "So you think Joker might have just taken the easy way out. Interesting. So, now that you're sitting in the big chair, who do you trust to leave the Major Crimes Unit to? Or have you been juggling your responsibilities?"

ENGEL: "Did you promote anyone?"

GORDON: "Yes, actually. I've promoted my top detective to the job. Harvey Bullock."

ENGEL: "Ah, I see. We've covered some stories on ... I suppose he'd now be Captain Bullock. Apparently he's set a record for the state in police brutality complaints. All dismissed, of course."

GORDON: "He has been very reliable as a detective thus far. I'm sure he'll do fine."

ENGEL: "No argument here. I think it's refreshing to have an MCU head that understand these freaks need a punch in the face now and then. Speaking of which, the Catwoman recently stole a bank, and the Penny Plunderer made a brazen terrorist attack on Phoenix Pharmaceuticals, now one of the frontier pharmaceutical companies in the nation. Seems they're escalating their agendas, whatever they may be. How do you feel about this?"

GORDON: "It's certainly not a good thing, no. What we can hope for though is that criminals like Jarvis and Felicity will slip up as their crimes become more serious and risky."

GORDON: "We should be able to catch them soon enough at this rate."

ENGEL: "That's comforting. I'm sure you're the man for the job.

What about the riots? Any leads on the perpetrator of that awful crime? Theories?"

GORDON: "We're currently identifying and treating the many who participated. We'll be able to question the many... witnesses very soon."

ENGEL: "That's excellent news, Commissioner. You gained your promotion within two crises, but it seems like you're on top of things.

Any general thoughts on other criminals? The Joker, Hush, Black Mask, ... The Batman? Perhaps some thoughts on the death of Antonio "Bane" Marcos and Terry Gilliam, also known as Robin?"

GORDON: "Marcos and Gilliam were criminals, yes, but their deaths were unfortunate nonetheless, for various reasons."

ENGEL: "Perhaps we should talk organized crime, now.

What are your thoughts on the death of Carmine Falcone, and the possible effect of this on the Italian-American crime syndicate? The discovery of eight known Falcone associates in the Chechen's territory and the napalm-bombing of Samovar that followed is certainly alarming."

GORDON: "Falcone's death was especially unfortunate. He would have been able to give us crucial information on many other criminals."

GORDON: "However, we do have a promising lead on the Chechen, which is a very good thing."

ENGEL: "Can you elaborate, or would that be classified at present?"

GORDON: "Classified."

Engel nods

ENGEL: "In that case, I'd like to return to the subject of the eight executed Falcone associates and the fire at Samovar. The implications are interesting, especially given the order of events. Do you think we're headed for a gang war, Commissioner?"

GORDON: "It could happen. If it does, we will stop it. That's all there is to it really."

ENGEL: "Confident words from a confident man.

You may recall several days ago when we heard reports of constant gunfire and explosions coming from a warehouse in the Niles Slums area. MCU officers and investigators on scene said they had a direct order to close down the scene and not admit any members of the news media. Why is this? Can you reveal anything now that you couldn't before?"

GORDON: "All I can say is that it was the scene of a major gang fight."

ENGEL: "May we know the names of the parties involved?"

ENGEL: "Or the syndicates in question?"

GORDON: "Yes, at this time it wouldn't harm our investigations to inform you that the fighting that went on there seemed to be a direct attack on Black Mask. Evidence highly suggests that Carmine Falcone and his men were behind the assault."

ENGEL: "Well, in that case, we had better let you get going -- it certainly sounds like you have a lot on your plate, Commissioner! Thanks for taking the time to speak with us this evening."

GORDON: "Thank you, Mike."

November 12th, 2008


Once again, the Gotham Gazette has failed to go to print. But, as Gotham City rises once again to make another attempt at a normal life, something far more interesting than WCRX captures the attention of the metropolis's denizens.



At once, each television in Gotham City flickers... revealing Black Mask.

As always, he sits before a great sable curtain, no doubt meant to disguise his location.

"Did you forget about me, Gotham? I haven't forgotten about you. You owe me, and I'm going to collect my payment," he says, in his gravelly and loathsome voice. The camera continues to pan back, farther and farther...




Until it reveals that he is wearing a green suit, with black question marks. As he leans from his cane, he takes one hand from it to remove the mask, revealing a man in a green bowler hat with a black question mark emblazoned on the front and a purple domino mask. He grins, as the black curtain behind him swings open.

It reveals a late night show setup, with a fake Gotham skyline behind and all (though Wayne Tower is hastily painted over). On the desk, as Riddler walks about, you can see a man in a pristine suit, bound atop it with thick cables. he is aimed at the camera from the side, lengthwise/perpendicular.

Riddler walks over to him and slips the black mask over his face.

AH, that mask didn't really fit me, it fits this guy better.

Good morning, my fellow citizens of Gotham and of America, the greatest, best, freest country god ever gave man on the face of the Earth! It's been a while, but I've been busy.

I'd like to invite you all to play a little game with my guest here. Though I helped to put the Joker into prison, it seems that Gotham's normal prison system can not sufficiently hold him, and I wonder if even Guantanamo bay could hold Black Mask, even with the damage done to his gang by the late Falcone.

Black Mask is a senseless man, you'd all agree? And though I've captured him, I can't just trust the prison system to hold him. No fault of theirs, but they're not prepared to handle certain types.

So the course of action is rather obvious. I give this opportunity to you, Gotham, to make Black Mask's body a prison. I'm going to give you six riddles. To answer, just call text your answer to this address. Your answers will be anonymous, and you can send as many as you can think of. Include with your answer one of the following: Sight, smell, taste, touch, or hearing. If you are the first to answer the riddle correctly, Black Mask here will be permanently deprived of that sense.

Black Mask, if you guess first, then you too can choose a sense. It will be "saved" and will no longer be an option for removal. Who knows, you might even be able to get them all first, and then who will look senseless?

I am looking for specific answers to these riddles. If the correct answer is not given within a few minutes, I will choose what I feel is the best answer.

To the regular authorities out there, I suggest you do not try to find my present location, you will only be wasting your time.

Let us begin.


Put two together and you get one.
Put three together an you get one.
Put them all together and you get one.
Take them all away and you get one.
They are innumerable, and they are not numbers.
What are they?

(AIM the answers to me at Smash Addict)

Oh, and we have the answer from someone who chooses to remain anonymous. The answer was colours. Put red and blue together and you get purple, put the three primary colours together and you can get any one colour, put them all together and you get white, take them all away and you get black.

The winner of this riddle has chosen to rid Black Mask of his sight.

Alright folks, we'll be back in a moment after a word from our sponsor.

0700


"This is WCRX, the Cold Room, and I'm Louis Tarnidge.

I want whomever just humored The Riddler to know that you're no better a monster than Black Mask... or The Riddler. That's right. He may lash out at criminals, but The Riddler is playing with us like laboratory mice, all the while with a smug grin. He is not who he appears to be.


It's our duty as citizens to stall this game. To let good people like Jim Gordon and Harvey Bullock catch both of these maniacs and put them where they belong -- in prison. Preferably in different cell blocks.


Call in, Gotham. What do you think about this situation? Should we continue to play The Riddler's game and prove the existence of bloodlust and self-absorbed fear that fools like the Joker try to pervade? Have we really lowered ourselves to that level? Should we? Why?

This is your city. Now use your voice -- because, for once, the sociopaths are listening with open ears."

I think this game needs to be stopped. This is nothing short of torture, and I see no reason why the citizens of Gotham should lower themselves to the level of those like the Joker, Black Mask, Riddler, and all the others who have been prominent recently. We can bring justice to these men the right way instead of... This... Gotham, stand up and show these criminals that they have not removed our humanity, and that we aren't willing to play games with the lives of even our most heinous criminals. We're better than this Gotham, let's prove it.

Tarnidge: "Much appreciated, Mr. Mayor. Let's open up the phone lines, we've got a caller named... Melissa Joan Gold.

You're in the Cold Room."

Gold: "Hi Louis, thanks for taking my call."

Tarnidge: "Not a problem."

Gold: "What's going on right now is sort of ridiculous, but I think its a good thing."

Tarnidge: "How so?"

Gold: "I read in the Gazette that the Riddler caught the Joker and handed him over to the police, who weren't competent enough to keep him in a cell."

Gold: "Now I see on TV that the Riddler caught the Black Mask, the terrorist who killed thousands of working Gothamites and spat in our faces?"

Gold: "Black Mask put hundreds of Gotham families through things much worse than death. I bet every single one of us knows a family who lost someone in the Wayne Tower attacks."

Gold: "And now he's being put to justice not only by the only man whose proven himself capable of doing so, but by all of us as well."

Gold: "We get to decide what we take from that horrible man. It might be dark, but its a damn good thing."

Tarnidge: "What we do to the man won't bring back our lost loved ones, and I doubt they'd want to be honored that way."

Tarnidge: "Watch the way that man grins when he does ... well, what he does. He enjoys the game."

Tarnidge: "His concerns are not the feelings of Gothamites, of that I can assure you."

Tarnidge: "Why carry on this exercise? If he's such a hero, why doesn't he just execute him right now? If he's really doing this because the police can't hold him?"

Tarnidge: "You sound like a smart girl. You also sound pretty naive."

Gold: "Bottom line: I really don't care if he enjoys the game if I also enjoy the game. I can speak for a lot of Gothamites when I say that I feel this terrorist deserves worse than death, and I can speak for just as many when I say that I don't trust the justice system or the GCPD to bring us, well, to bring us justice. They let Batman escape, they let the Joker escape, they let the Catwoman escape, the Faraway Tree Killer, the Penny Train bomber or whatever he wants to be called... this Riddler has proven himself to be more of a hero to me than Commissioner Swiss Cheese Gordon. I'm just fine watching the executioner smile as he kills the criminal. Throughout history we've stoned, we've hanged, we've decapitated... that's what this is. And it feels good."

Tarnidge: "Well, I certainly won't admit fault on my part because I can look at a situation without rage clouding my perceptions."

Tarnidge: "But your opinions are appreciated. Next callers... you're on the Cold Room."

I do not feel any sympathy for the man, the Black Mask. If one is so willing to take lives, one must be willing to forfeit their own as well. While it is well outside of the established law, one must be whole heartedly ignorant to believe the judicial system you have in place is not seething with corruption. I must doubt the idea that any fair punishment would ever be levied out to him due to both the incompetence of the good and efficiency of the bad. No, I do not think his death is a poor thing.

And I don't think any of you disagree with me. I think what you despise is who is doing it, not what is being done. There is a Chinese saying that says "the good executioner wishes he were not" and I believe it holds somewhat true here. Killing another person is a brutal and particularly moral thing. We believe that no one should want to kill and that those that take joy from it are monsters among men. The Riddler is obviously taking joy in this arrangement, whether it be the attention or the sadism of the act, and I believe that is what you people are protesting. If this whole charade were held out of view, there would be no qualms. Yes, he lavishes with pomp and circumstance and draws out in several minutes a punishment that, while superfluous, is no worse than the life imprisonment that he will never righteously get from the courts.

The ability to ward off future criminals is important. to show them that the risk is not worth their reward. It is the exact same thing the Batman does: he breaches the law to deter the vagrants and vagabonds of our city from becoming the new drug lords and serial killers. There is no doubt that it is drastic, but only to match the crimes of the perpetrator.

Tarnidge: "Intelligent words, but I can't say I support the wisdom behind them.

Okaaaay, Chuck Finley, you're on the Cold Room."

Finley: "Hello, I just wanted to say that the Riddler is no better than the Joker or the Black Mask. He is a criminal, the thing he did to Black Mask and the things he's probably going to do to him are inexcusable. This isn't the right way to handle crime. I sympathize with those who want revenge against him, but revenge isn't the right way."

Tarnidge: "I absolutely agree."

Tarnidge: "Becoming a bunch of rabid dogs isn't going to fix anything Black Mask did and is only going to turn our city into a metropolis of monsters."

Finley: "I would also like to say that I feel that the Riddler is also partially responsible for the Joker's escape as he underestimated the Joker as well. Why didn't he just leave the Joker at Blackgate?"

Tarnidge: "Well, as sure as the Joker is also a monster, he still has the right to a fair trial."

Tarnidge: "Does he deserve it? Probably not. But selectively taking away the rights of a few is what pushes this country into dictatorship territory."

Finley: "True that the Joker does deserve a fair trial. But the chances of him getting away with his crimes without some sort of punishment is very unlikely. We know that he would most likely go to Blackgate or Arkham. Even so, Arkham is known for it's patients to escape rather easily. So what would be the chances of keeping him at Arkham?"

Finley: "We can't blame the system's principles -- we should always blame the men who fail to make them work.

Alright, thanks for your opinions. Next caller..."

The answer for this riddle has been given, it was Time. The riddle was alluding to Greenwich Mean Time so if you're uninformed you couldn't get it, sorry! The winner of the riddle has chosen not to remain anonymous. His name is Martin Kendle, and he has chosen to remove Black Mask's sense of touch.

The Riddler tips his hat and walks along the desk until he is at Black Mask's side, and lifts his head a moment.

"Don't worry. You won't feel a thing."

He giggles briefly as he drops Black Mask's head back down and draws a syringe from his pocket. He attaches a needle, sterilizes it. He flicks it to test, and then lifts Black Mask's head once more, hands still shaky from his chuckling, and inserts the syringe right into the brain stem. Slowly, he pushes the plunger in until every drop of the transparent fluid is absorbed.

The Riddler smiles, dropping Black Mask's head one last time and turning to the camera, smiling.

Oh, and this one has been anwwered by Black Mask! Sorry folks, you were slow on this one and it was easy. The answer was Fire. He has chosen to preserve his sense of hearing, so that one's off the table.

Nation, we'll be back in a moment after another word from our sponsors. Stay tuned!

Evil Eye said:

It flies across his "set", and a canned cat yelp is heard

Click to expand...

I heard that, you know.

Annnd the answer's been guessed. It was luck. The person who guessed has chosen not to remain anonymous, his name is Brandon Beene, and he has chosen to remove Black Mask's sense of smell.

Gotham Gazette November 13th, 2008



Riddle Me This, City of Gotham By Vicki Vale

The Riddler on the set of his pirated late night show, festively deciding the fate of Black Mask

The larger than life figure The Riddler is recently known for the apprehension of the serial killing Joker, his enigmatic relationship with Gotham’s own Batman, and his questionable relationship with the Gotham City Police Department. And now as of yesterday, he has hijacked the televisions of the city and is broadcasting his own gameshow of life and death, in which citizens of Gotham answer riddles to decide the fate of the high profile terrorist, Black Mask.

The Riddler claims to have designed six mind games, five riddles that he wants the city of Gotham to mull over. Thousands are e-mailing in with answers, and when someone has the correct one, they are able to make a gruesome choice – which of the five senses they want to take from Black Mask, the man who orchestrated the destruction of Wayne Tower and the death of so many beloved citizens of our city. If by some chance the terrorist is able to correctly guess before any of those who wish for his demise, he will be able to reclaim one of his senses now up for grabs, securing that part of his life for the future to come.

Already someone has correctly answered a riddle, the answer being “colors,” and fittingly claimed the terrorist’s eyesight. Four riddles followed, as promised. Citizens of our city proudly stripped Black Mask of his sight, smell, and sense of feeling. The domestic terrorist, long-maligned as public enemy number one in the United States of America, managed to save his sense of hearing, and the fate of his sense of taste was still up in the air at press time today. One can assume that thousands are still typing in answers as fast as they can think of them.

Public opinion is conflicted on The Riddler – some Gothamites view him as a hero, the only one in the city who could apprehend the villainous Black Mask, a hero for the people. Others dismiss his heroism for what it is – another flavor of individual acts taking self-precedence over the law. Friends and family debate over the definition of justice, of the law, and between right and wrong, while the world wide web crowds with puzzlers desperate to answer the riddles and choose Black Mask’s fate.

The fact of the matter is, The Riddler laid claim to the Black Mask and the Gotham authorities have found no ground to oppose the claim. Not only were they unable to catch the terrorist before The Riddler did, but even as The Riddler broadcasts his torturous gameshow to the entire city, the GCPD shows no signs of knowing where he is. Captain Bullock of MCU confirms that they're pursuing leads on the case, and can't disclose anything else for investigative reasons – a familiar song sung often sung by his predecessor Jim Gordon.

Another indisputable yet dark truth is that The Riddler openly enjoys this massively public exercise. In classic narcissistic fashion, he has made himself the center of attention for millions, everyone talking about him – is he a hero, is he a villain, is he right or wrong, where is he, how did he catch the Black Mask – and his methods are questionable in many ways, but clearly sadistic. Instead of taking the Black Mask to jail, he took it upon himself to transform it all into a game. In his own world, he is a game show host, the city of Gotham are the contestants, and the fate of Black Mask is a toy to be gambled and awarded. Black Mask may get what he deserves, but there is no justice in this exercise.

The Riddler abducted a man a few days ago from the front of the Gotham Museum of Art & Culture – we can now confirm that this man matches the body type of the subdued Black Mask. With the police scratching at his coattails and the city of Gotham playing his game, all eyes are on The Riddler... and in the air above MCU, wondering if the Batman will be the one to stop this game.


Cat's Cradle? By Tom Tucker

An artist's depiction of what eyewitness Jenna Chiu claimed to see

Tragedy struck the Red Triangle yesterday, an area that had quieted down considerably since the purported escape of Henri Ducard, and before that, the alleged "Batman Attacks".

But there was nothing quiet happening in the home of George Waters, who lived in a modest home at 259 Beijing Terrace. According to his long-time girlfriend and, recently, fiancée Jenna Chiu, Waters went to answer the door in the early afternoon. She was unable to overhear the conversation that took place between Waters and the purported suspect, but she said she heard an unusual, muffled sound.

Coming downstairs quickly, she called out to Waters, who did not answer. She soon heard a vehicle driving away, and the front door was left wide open. As she came into the foyer to check on Waters, she found that he had collapsed suppine, bleeding from several chest wounds and barely breathing.

Chiu said that she quickly grabbed a nearby cordless phone and hid in the corner while dialing for emergency services. Not long thereafter, she claimed to see a silhouette tampering with Waters. As the silhouette fidgeted in the scant light from the foyer, Chiu testified that it was "definitely female, with big cat ears and glowing goggles. Some kind of leather suit." After being accosted by Chiu, the intrusive female and likely suspect fled the scene.

Questioned as to the plausibility of a Catwoman killing, MCU's Captain Harvey Bullock commented: "She just stole a bank. A whole bank. It's pretty [expletive deleted] clear she got a whole ballgame up her sleeve we ain't been expectin'. I ain't rulin' anything out, not with [Catwoman]."


Absent-Professors Minded By Stanton Kiel

The home of Dr. Marcks, taped off by GCPD

Today, six high-status professors have been kidnapped, along with their families.

Among those missing are Dr. Howard Marcks and Dr. Maxwell Billings, heads of the Cryptology and English departments at Robinson University, respectively. Four other professors of similar statures and specialty have gone missing as well.

There were no witnesses at any of the scenes and no clues as to who the perpetrators are. All the professors and their families seem to have been taken from their homes, leaving behind blood and other signs of struggle, along with the front doors of their houses being left open.

One can't help but suppose, due to the specialties of the professors taken, that these incidents are somehow related to solving the riddles posed by The Riddler. The professors seem to have been kidnapped in rapid succession during the Riddler's broadcast.


Today's Population: 5,590,035

And someone finally got the answer: whistle! You don't need a whistle to whistle, but some people can't whistle without using a whistle.

The person who answered correctly has chosen to give his name: Jim Gordon. And there's only one sense left, and it's taste

Now this may have seemed anticlimactic, especially since Black Mask was rather tasteless to begin with. But everybody's favourite segment is coming up next, so stay tuned!

Really Gordon? So I suppose you approve of this twisted game?

20:00



GOTHAM TONIGHT

Good evening, Gotham City. This is Mike Engel, with your nightly crime update.








As yet there have been no signs of sarin gas attacks in the Pink District, and many are beginning to doubt whether an attack was ever more than a whimsical notion. All the same, the National Guard and G.C.P.D. continue to patrol the district in force, warding off looters and -- hopefully -- sociopathic clowns.




Tragedy struck in the Brown District, today.

Paul Hardy, owner and operator of Hardy's Auto Shop, was found murdered in his apartment. Apparently he had been shot in the back of he head. There were no signs of a struggle, and neighbors mentioned no sounds of argument or gunshots when pressed.

Employees at Hardy's Auto Shop expressed alarm at the news of Hardy's demise, and stated that he had no enemies known to them. He will be missed.




Repairs to the Phoenix Pharmaceuticals headquarters, after the Penny Plunderer's recent terrorist attack against the emerging corporation, is said to be going well. Mr. Phoenix himself has gone on the record as saying that they "expect the repairs to be complete by the end of the month, and research in relevant areas to the floors damaged to continue by the end of next week."

A bit of good news I think we all needed to hear.




And for tonight's true mystery, we have the unsolved warehouse fire just north of Chinatown. Residents of the Red Triangle, or the Dark Red District, will likely remember that the building had smoke generating from its roof several days ago. However, this petered out, and the registered owner of the warehouse -- Shorevale Properties, Inc. -- called away the response team, citing the fire as "under control."

Shortly after being promoted to the top of the Major Crimes Unit, Captain Harvey Bullock secured a search warrant to investigate the Shorevale property. Now open to the press, as you can see, the warehouse is completely empty and utterly ruined from the inside. One cannot help but wonder why Shorevale would overestimate the abilities of their fire procedures and risk -- wrongly, it seems -- the sanctity of one of their properties. I think I speak for the media when I say that we'll be looking into this.

Gotham Gazette November 14th, 2008





Murder and Reputation By Vicki Vale

"The Chechen" seen above in his home city of Grozny, Chechnya. Photo courtesy of the Russian Embassy.

Residents of Halifax, Nova Scotia were shocked to find that a prolific crime lord had fled his territory in America for the relative escape of Canada. Royal Canadian Mounted Police, Canada’s premiere investigations bureau, held a press conference to reveal the details of the criminal investigation that ended in a mysterious mass murder.

According to RCMP spokesman Donald Donahue, the Halifax division received communication from Commissioner James Gordon of our own GCPD that the leader of Gotham City’s Eastern European crime syndicate, the infamously brutal man known only as the Chechen, had apparently taken up residence in the Canadian province of Nova Scotia. GCPD submitted to the RCMP a full case-file of all known criminal activities of the Chechen and his crime syndicate and requested that the RCMP perform a phone trace to determine his location – they did so, and informed Commissioner Gordon that the Chechen’s cellular phone was triangulated to Pier 27 of Halifax’s vast harbor. Gordon quickly agreed to form a taskforce with the Canadian authorities through INTERPOL with the intent to catch the Chechen.

On the night of November 11th, the Halifax port authority and local police were called to respond to what several boat owners reported as “noises like repeated gunfire.” The location given – Pier 27. When Halifax police responded, they discovered through the port authority that the gunfire was coming from a yacht named The Liberty, which was not registered in the port’s booking system.

When police stormed the yacht, they found twenty-one men dead, by either repeated shots to the body or cuts to the throat. Among the dead was the Chechen, now identified as Mikael Dmitrios, a landed immigrant from the unrecognized republic of Chechnya. Dmitrios was found on his bed, shot in the chest and head, his AK-47 assault rifle still clutched in his hands.

Donahue went on record commenting that he is “very interested to know why shortly after providing the location of a crime boss to Commissioner Gordon, [the crime boss] ends up assassinated with all hands on deck.”

While Gordon refused to comment in direct response to Donahue’s accusations or in regards to the scene of the crime, he simply noted that “[the GCPD] had not been able to take any actions against the Chechen before he was murdered.” He refused to comment on potential connections that may lead this case back to the city of Gotham, including the involvement of rival gangs. The Chechen’s group of so-called urban soldiers began to encroach quickly on the territory of rival gangs of both the Falcone family, who must have recently gone through a quick change of power, and Roland Gambol’s gang, which suffered extreme losses in manpower after the disappearance of leader.

These accusations towards Gordon come at a curious time, as the man who answered the fifth of The Riddler’s questions identified himself as Jim Gordon. The Commissioner flatly remarked that he did not participate in The Riddler’s game before our interview ended.



Hit and Run Kidnapping By Alexander Knox

Above, a cell-phone camera shot of the kidnapper's van, in Crime Alley

When Adad Beyda's fare didn't show up at the agreed upon street corner, he spent a few minutes driving around, asking pedestrians if they were "Marvin Patience". Pretty soon, though, Adad gave up and got back to work. He wasn't happy, but he also wasn't surprised. This sort of thing happened to him all the time. If he had known why Marvin Patience didn't show up for his ride, he probably would have been.

If the name sounds familiar to you, it's not surprising. Patience was the defense attorney of Kurt Tessle, more commonly known as "Killer Croc". Now, he seems to have gone missing. Witnesses who were near the area where Patience was to meet the cab reported seeing a white van pull up to a man matching Patience's description outside a restaurant on the corner in the civic area. After a brief struggle, the van sped away. Patience was gone, now the kidnapping victim of an unseen van driver.

Later that same day, another incident occurred - this time in Crime Alley. Witnesses report hearing about six gunshots, in rapid succession. The brave few who ventured near to get a closer look saw a muscular white man fighting two African-American men in the alley. The African-American men were both bleeding heavily. At the end of the alleyway stood an empty white van. One witness was quick witted enough to mark down the license plate, which was registered to a private citizen who had reported the car missing a number of days ago.

Late yesterday, Damian Malcolms, an African-American sociology student at Robinson University, was reported missing by his roommate.



No Punchline By Tom Tucker

Traffic is heavy in the Pink District as many Gothamites are swift to move back to their homes

With almost a week having passed since his initial threats of a sarin attack against the poor of Gotham City, the Joker has still failed to make good of his promises. Mayor Rupert Thorne is still alive, as are the brave men and women of the G.C.P.D. and New York National Guard who have worked hard to keep the area safe.

Whether this should be taken as a sign of victory on the part of the deterring authorities remains in question, even to police brass. What is most important, however, is that it seems as though residents of the Pink District can breathe a sigh of relief. Many already have, as hundreds and -- at last report, thousands -- are beginning to make the pilgrimage back to their homes from wherever they took refuge during the sarin scare.

One cannot help but wonder what sort of motivation the Joker has for his crimes. Something like sarin gas is, based on prior accomplishments, most likely not outside his set of resources or abilities. And yet it seems he chose only to strike fear and panic into Gothamites, ostensibly to have them kill our Mayor. Or, perhaps, simply to prove that someone would?

What matters is that no one did so, and no recorded attempts on the Mayor's life have been mentioned. The Joker may have inspired fear and chaos, but he has yet to inspire the kind of monstrous behavior that he has exhibited -- in that respect he remains alone.


Today's Population: 5,590,033

You just can't count on people these days

You have to do Everything. Your

Self

21:00





Good evening, Gotham City, and welcome to Gotham Tonight. Mike Engel is off tonight, so I'll be filling in -- this is Lydia Filangeri, with a breaking news story.






After a few relatively quiet evenings, Gotham City Police responded to the calls of panicked patrons fleeing the Nite Owl club in the dark blue district. These calls warned of the Joker making an appearance, and shortly thereafter, many calls overloaded the GCPD head office to warn them of a near constant surge of gunfire.

The Nite Owl club, as many have no doubt found, is owned by the late Mikael Dmitrios, also known as The Chechen. One can take a fair enough guess as to why the Joker would direct such a brazen assault there.

However, over one hundred dead civilians was only the beginning to this clown prince's evening, as he reportly fled to a nearby Lamborghini, purple in color, at which point he deployed a multiple rocket launcher and decimated MCU SWAT teams on the scene, as well as the police chopper dedicated to the case. Captain Harvey Bullock, who managed to leap from the helicopter before it was shot down, was the only survivor.






Apparently not quite finished with his evening, the Joker moved on, apparently, to fulfill one end of his early ultimatum.

Police were soon summoned when a massive explosion badly damaged the main floor of ThorneCorp's headquarters in downtown Gotham. Gotham City's own fire department is still struggling to put out the blaze, though staff have been successfully evacuated.

Witnesses mentioned seeing a GCPD helicopter landing on the top of the tower within minutes, taking off shortly thereafter.



One can only speculate what transpired from that point to now, but at some point, horrified Gothamites were to witness the spectacle of the decade -- Mayor Rupert Thorne hanging from a helicopter by his own intestines, trailing a banner that proclaimed for the citizens to "Vote Rupert Thorne: For a Safer Community". Mayor Thorne, still alive during this horror, apparently managed to partially deploy a parachute to free himself. He was rushed to Gotham General in extremely critical condition, and the media has been locked out of his entire wing.


Stay with us for more breaking news. And in the meantime, Gotham, feel free to call in and lend us your voice.

"All this time and still no contact from the Penny Plunderer. I wasn't suspicious of your request for prep-time when I challenged you earlier, but honey, I'm beginning to think that you're a just a coward."

Gotham Gazette November 15th, 2008



At The End of a Thorny Road By Alexander Knox

Gotham General Hospital remains cordoned off to the media, even by today at press time

At seven last night, a truck bomb exploded on the main floor of ThorneCorp's world headquarters in downtown Gotham. The driver, Antonio Buggatti, was still inside. Although the police suspected Buggatti of ties to the Falcone crime family, but according to anonymous sources he was actually a transporter for both Falcone and Sal Maroni. The explosion rocked the main floor, but caused no casualties.

Police and fire department arrived quickly. Meanwhile, Rupert Thorne armed himself and entered his panic room, surrounded by his personal bodygaurds. Thorne was in constant communication via cell phone with GCPD Captain Harvey Bullock. A few minutes after Thorne entered the panic room, a GCPD helicopter descended onto the ThorneCorp building's roof.

Thorne confirmed with Captain Bullock that the police had sent a helicopter. He headed up to meet the chopper, leaving his bodygaurds behind. Instead, he ran into a SWAT team which had come from the helicopter, at the entrance to his penthouse. The leader of the team told him that they had been sent by Commissioner Gordon to pick him up. Thorne went with them to the helicopter, and it took off, with Thorne on board.

The next time anyone saw Rupert Thorne was fifteen minutes later. He was hanging from the helicopter by his own intestines. In a grotesque mockery of the good he planned to do for this city, a banner trailed from his body, reading, "VOTE RUPERT THORNE: FOR A SAFER COMMUNITY".

However, Thorne was never a quitter. Despite his horrible wounds, he was able to free himself by partially deploying a parachute. Sadly, the parachute had been sabotaged by his captors, and it did not do enough to break his fall. He sustained more injuries, but was picked up and rushed to the hospital in critical condition with a broken arm, three broken ribs, a fractured skull and heavy blood loss. He was already in shock when they picked him up at at 7:37, and his wounds had been heavily infected with a multitude of diseases.

Rupert Thorne was pronouced dead at 11:02 PM. He fought until he could fight no longer.

It is in that spirit that I come forward, at great risk to my personal wellbeing, with information I have gained about the persons responsible for the murder of Rupert Thorne.

The Joker is the likely mastermind behind the murder. Sal Maroni is the man who made it possible.

This information comes from sources who, for obvious reasons, do not wish to be named. Nonetheless, it is both reliable and true.

Antonio Buggatti, the driver of the truck that exploded in the ThorneCorp building, had a history of doing illegal, but non-violent jobs for Mister Maroni. Before his death, according to the statements of a witness, he was forced to become a member of the Joker's "personal army." This army was choosen by Sal Maroni. When he was asked to become part of the "army", he did not dare to refuse. When the Joker is involved, it's easy to guess what would happen to anyone who didn't want to play the game.

It appears that, with Falcone's death, the Joker was forced to find a different master to hold his leash. Now, the Joker's new master has made his presence known, and his name is Sal Maroni.




Maroni's Bird-Hunting Dog By Alexander Knox

The deathly carnage after the Joker's escape

The Nite Owl dance club was owned by Mikael Dmitrios, also known as The Chechen. It has long been suspected of being used for money laundering, although the police never had enough evidence to attain a warrant.

At 6:34, a purple Lamborghini pulled up in front of the Nite Owl. Out of it came several armed men, and Maroni's favorite new hunting dog, generally known as The Joker. The patrons fled as soon as they recognized the garish makeup of one of Gotham's most famous canines. Sadly, the Joker's pack opened fire on those who fled. Most did not manage to escape.

The dogs had the owl in their jaws. They now proceeded to rip it apart. The Joker's men came into from the Nite Owl from all entrances, firing indiscriminately at anything that moved. Although The Chechen's men fired back from the catwalks, they were overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of the Joker's pack. Eventually, the Joker made it up to the second floor of the night club. Found in the office were the burnt corpses of the majority of the men thought to be the Chechen's closest advisors.

It was at this point that Captain Bullock arrived with an MCU SWAT force and a large number of policemen to seal the scene off. The SWAT teams burst in from all sides to secure the building. However, the officers who had entered the building from the rear were found burnt alive, suggesting that the Joker went through them to make his escape. Although Captain Bullock still had control of the area around the club, it was at this point that an army of armed men arrived in Hummers, heavily armed. They launched an attack on the police surrounding the scene, and the police were forced to respond.

The Joker, unsuprisingly, turned tail and ran. With the help of a companion, he was able to eliminate the police snipers in the area and sneak back to his vehicle. Captain Bullock himself narrowly missed the Joker while shooting from a police helicopter. To the shock and horror of any on the scene, the Joker's vehicle deployed a multiple rocket launcher, not unlike the degree of technology exhibited by the Batman. He proceeded to annihilate the pursuing police force. When he finally turned his attention to the police helicopter, Captain Bullock was able to dive out into the Atlantic Ocean.

Reinforcements arrived, but without air support they were unable to keep up with the Joker's vehicle.

Now the question is, who will Maroni sic his dog on next?


Today's Population: 5,589,950

Gotham Gazette November 16th, 2008






Heroes of Gotham City By Vicki Vale

Top Left: The infamously popular image of Detective Harvey Bullock of years' past taunting a photographer.
Bottom Left: Today's Harvey Bullock, taken at the ceremony for his promotion to MCU Captain. Bullock demanded that the affair be casual and cut short so they “could get back to work.”
Top Right: District Attorney John Scott, taken in his home.
Bottom Right: John Scott is one man you do not want to see on the other side of a closed courtroom.

The days of gang leaders and masked criminal masterminds overwhelming the forces of justice in Gotham City are coming to an end. The course of recent events has turned the tide against evildoers, as their unorganized numbers thin due to criminal on criminal action and the efforts of the rejuvenated Gotham’s Finest. It was once said that the war on crime in Gotham City was a three-pronged attack led by the MCU, the District Attorney’s office, and the vigilante hero Batman. Though the faces may change as the war is won, the attack plan remains the same.

Enter Harvey Bullock, Captain of the GCPD’s Major Crimes Unit, a position of high regard given to him by his predecessor, Police Commissioner Jim Gordon. Over the past several days, Bullock has proven to be a worthy successor. He is rough, he is unshakable, and he is undeterred by the Joker or any of the other major criminals in the city. And he cracks down on gang violence like none other.

Two nights ago, Bullock led the MCU response against the Joker’s attack on the Nite Owl Club. His heroics are endless: it was reported that Bullock fired a round from his pistol, from a moving helicopter, that missed the Joker’s head by inches. When asked if he wanted to comment to the public, he had two things to say.

“To the people of Gotham, we almost had him. And we would've, if we were prepared for the resources he was gonna be usin'. Keep your faith in the GCPD, and keep your phones ready. We need you to pinpoint him - the rest is up to us.

“To the Joker, you're a coward. You know it and I know it. I'd love nothin' more than a personal chance to teach you some manners, but I know how you play. I dunno if you got the mob too scared to say no t'ya or if they're really too dumb to know you're no good for 'em, but I'd say if any of 'em are smart they'll put a bullet in your head first chance. If they don't, I'll be glad to take their place.”

With the recent injury and disappearance of Harvey Dent, the court’s role in the fight against crime seemed destined to crumble. And yet, under such a certain threat, a new Gothamite has emerged and proven himself fully capable of finishing what Dent began. District Attorney John Scott was a prosecutor of the state in the highest regard under Dent’s leadership and a natural choice to assume leadership. And while he might humbly deprecate that he doesn’t have Harvey Dent’s charisma for the media, it is only a matter of time until he wins us over with straight results.

“I plan to personally handle any criminal who has been the cause of any form of terrorism in this city,” he affirms. “No one is better than me in front of the bar. No one.”

Last night around 2:00 in the morning at the Daydream Inn, a police sting operation led by Police Commissioner Jim Gordon and Captain of MCU Harvey Bullock resulted in the apprehension of a dozen men, believed to be the remaining sect of men working for the terrorist Black Mask. With the entertaining yet sadistic friend-or-foe Riddler eliminating the terrorist leader as a threat, the apprehension of all of his men ensures a complete stop to their terrorist activity. The operation involved roughly two dozen plainclothes and two dozen SWAT officers, and no deaths on either side of the fight.

And the presence of the Batman? While the police bombarded the terrorists with gunfire and gas, half of the men were found beaten and unconscious in a motel room. Eyewitness reports swear to have seen a giant, endless cable fired straight into the air, illuminated by a blinking red light, there were no reports of the Batman literally seen at the sting, and the police refused to comment on his possible involvement.


The Dog Still Howls By Tom Tucker

The Colemans Removal & Storage warehouse, at presstime

Just recently, the Joker took the fight to the Eastern European syndicate, seemingly on behalf of the Italian mafia. Yesterday was no exception.

Early in the morning, rapid gunfire was reported by citizens of the dark blue district, seemingly coming from Colemans Removal & Storage, a company that has sat dormant on its Fairbank Avenue warehouse property for many years. Some eyewitnesses claimed to glimpse fleeting images of the Joker and his entourage fleeing the scene before police arrived.

Vitaly Machinko, a known high-level lieutenant of the Eastern European syndicate, was found executed in the parking lot of the property, as well as over a dozen of the Chechen's former associates. One Italian casualty, Donald Giovanni, was reported among the dead. He was a suspected member of the Falcone crime family, with a lengthy rapsheet.

Pressed for a comment on the escalating violence, Captain Bullock of MCU offered only that they were "kinda busy wipin' out the last of the Black Mask terrorists. If the Joker wants my full attention, he's got it."

With Roland Gambol's African-American gang completely quiet in this war and the scales rapidly tipping in the Falcone family's favor, it seems the Joker and Salvatore Maroni are well on their way to the monopoly they seem to be grasping for. The question is -- what do they plan to do when they get there?


Molten Copper By Alexander Knox

All that remains of the family-owned business is its vast expanse of scrap metal

Yesterday, tragedy struck at Sal's Scrap Emporium, a small, family business located on Monck Street. The business was owned and operated by Sal Collins. His nineteen year old son, Michael, had been working at the scrap emporium for years. They weren't getting rich, but they were making a decent living for themselves and Sal's wife, Maria.

Late last night, firefighters arrived to find the main builing in flames. Much of what was inside was burnt beyond recognizability. However, the most disturbing find that night was not. The body of Michael Collins was found in the middle of the fire. He had been stabbed many times in both the back and the front. His throat had also been cut. Sal has not come home since that night.

The man responsible for this grizzly scene is not as notorious as the Joker or Black Mask. He is not as powerful as Carmine Falcone was, or Salvatore Maroni is. However, Lincoln Jarvis is the man responsible for so many personal tragedies, just like this one.

It's not entirely clear why Jarvis, usually known as the Penny Plunderer, chose to attack the scrap emporium. No one knows why he came, murdered Michael Collins, and abducted Sal Collins in Sal's own truck.

What everyone does know is that what Lincoln Jarvis does is horrendous. He has to be stopped, but so far, the police seem incapable of stopping him. The police actually had him in custody a little more than a week ago, only to allow him to leave when he was not arraigned. The arraigment was missed by one of Gotham's most famous figures, former District Attorney Harvey Dent.

Gotham's other hero has also done little to go after the Penny Plunderer. There's no doubt that Commissioner James Gordon is a hero, but he seems to be unwilling or unable to delegate important work to his subordinates. In times like this, Gotham may need a manager in charge of the Gotham City Police Department, instead of a hero.

Until Gotham's heroes can solve their organizational problems, vicious, smalltime criminals like Lincoln Jarvis will continue to terrorize this city's streets.


Today's Population: 5,589,935