SHOUTOUTS:
ARIZONA
Jeff – You’re first, mainly because you took the effort to fly over to ABQ for this relatively small tournament. You’re **** good, a true professional, and don’t let any east coast ***got tell you otherwise. Congratulations on 1st place, and if you keep flying out to more
Most Angriest Shinobi tournaments, there’s a strong chance of you getting the grand prize
We’ve met many times before, at AZOneTwoStep, GENESIS, and Grand Challenge, but those were mere acquaintances. This time I felt like I got to know you best. Whatever you do, don’t change. Arizona is lucky to have you, your parents are lucky to have you, hell even your future wife and family should be thankful to have you (not the other way around!). You’ve got that congenial attitude that teenagers seldom have, let alone even those in the smash community.
The rest of AZ that didn’t show up – F
uck you. Jk lol. On second thought, not really.
MEXICO
Woker – see private message
Anji – It was a pleasure to meet you too. In fact, I just love meeting foreign smashers in particular, because many of you tend to have a more efficient, yet somehow at the same time, more technical playstyle. Many of us filthy Americans lack that virtue too
Anyways, I enjoyed playing you and your devastating fox. I still can't wrap my head around that playstyle
Mike & Quame & Frajo – I’m not entirely sure if you’re foreign or not. I barely remember exactly who’s who because you all usually hung out the melee back room and were somewhat quiet. That’s not a problem at all, but I do apologize for not formally introducing myself to the three of you. I also apologize if I mix you guys up.
Mike, congratulations on taking down one of New Mexico’s best players (Twin_A, the sheik).
Quame, as I said to Woker, I respect the fact that you play Samus, arguably the most technical and difficult character to master. Don’t ever get discouraged about your character. Few people know how to play against Samus anyway. I didn’t even notice you play Tekken, impressive placing!
Frajo, I guess we’ll have to meet up next tournament!
TEXAS
Arturo – I wanted to start with you for the same reason Webster did. A very special thank you to both you and your family for the amount of work and preparation you put in just to keep us entertained, satisfied, and comfortable (the pancakes were delicious lol). I know what it’s like – I house OOS smashers a lot. Also, I want to apologize to your sister (I’ve heard some things, let’s just leave it at that). Congratulations on knocking out Casey (sometimes I think he needs to be kept in check that way). I hope we meet up in future tournaments and legitimately hang out. The brawl-melee divide shouldn’t get in the way of our friendship. [/gay]
Luis – I am downright impressed that you sold your wii for beer. That’s gay and hardcore at the same time. Congratulations on being the best game and watch in the southwest (UTD Zac and Hylian don’t count. They live in Texas and aren’t cool enough to travel to another city
in their own god**** state.) Also, you would **** Dave in Colorado. We need to hang out too. You’re like the father I never had
Tetsuya – Why the **** didn’t we play melee
My falcon would have robbed your fox of his virginity and I more than likely would have robbed you of your cash. Speaking of which, at the next tournament, MONEYMATCH?!?!
Neocell – Hi. I’ve seen you at tournaments in El Paso here and there, but I don’t know you too well. We’ll need to fix that. Also, brawl moneymatch?!?!
The rest of El Paso that showed up – Good
shit.
The rest of EP and Texas that didn’t show up – F
uck you. Not you, Richard. Well actually, maybe.
NEW MEXICO
Patrick – Although I understand that you never want anybody to drive you car, I applaud the fact that you drove for nearly 10 hours, half of which extremely late at night with an altered state. Thank you for putting up with my crap in the car, whatever it was. I’ll get you good enough in melee to get second at tournaments, all right? Congratulations for being the best brawl peach in the state. Supposedly
Nolan – Honestly, I’m not exactly sure what to say. Sometimes I feel happy that I experienced a new side of life, other times I regret that I can’t “go back,” so to speak. All in all though, thank you for at least being brave, sensitive, and ensuring that I didn’t chicken out. Also, thanks for lending me that stuff from the Thursday beforehand, I’ve overstated my welcome and kept it for too long, so I’ll make sure to return what is rightfully yours soon.
Tekkie – I’m glad you’re so carefree and whimsical. Or else I wouldn’t have maintained my composure while high. Thanks for letting me be gay and hold on. I’ll have you know you’re manlier than Luis for eating that ****. Sometime later on this year I’ll hang out with you in Socorro so you can hack my wii and ****.
Zack – I appreciate the fact that you were sensitive too. Normally I’d expect you to go on your trolling rampage for what I did, but you didn’t. Thank you. Gratz on placing 5th, but that seems to be your magical placing - just like JT and Bryan’s 3rd in most NM tournaments. Although I didn’t see it, I heard you guys ***** in teams despite your placing.
J.T. – I heard you carried a certain team partner in brawl teams finals. Congratulations on repping ROB without picking up somebody else. If I were a brawler, I probably wouldn’t be so noble.
Casey – I’m sorry you didn’t get as many victims to poop on as you desired. Anywho, congratulations on the piles of cash you probably got. You could consider traveling to other
Most Angriest Shinobi tournaments; you’d have a shot at the grand prize
Erich – Throughout our tournament matches, especially in the past, I’ve noticed that you quickly get discouraged (even in the first few stocks of the first match). I seriously think that is what is holding you back. When you get down on yourself, you have two opponents (and I think that discouragement ultimately caused me to pull off that 3-stock comeback on Corneria last tournament). If it’s just your personality, then that’s perfectly fine (I can’t help you), just don’t let it control you. You’re a phenomenal player, and I’ve seen your Marth pull off innovative things that Ken and Mew2King only dream of. Seriously.
Kyle – I guess I need to train you. 7th place is decent, at best. Thank you for actually making it to the smashfest on Sunday though, I almost got really frustrated to hear that you would ditch us all for mini golf… Lastly, thank you for mustering up the courage and strength to lift 160+ lb. me over 5 feet from the floor during our photos and celebrations. That felt pretty good
David – I like how you did as well as your twin, although everyone here back in NM falsely purports that you are worse than your brother. Well **** them, this tournament is probably the deciding event to demonstrate your rapid improvement as a Jigglypuff player. Much like I promised Kyle, I’ll definitely train you with your problem matches. I just need to know when you’re free. Both you and your brother’s work schedule annoy the **** out of the rest of us ABQ smashers.
Lewis – I don’t mean to criticize, but you don’t seem to be a very committed smasher. I love you to death, but your friendship with the Twins allows you to travel to OOS tournaments where you barely do anything. The prime example is GENESIS. I’m not trying to claim you’re lazy, but you show an interest in smash only at the fests in ABQ. Sure you entered the tournament, but afterwards you just silently lounge in your chair for hours and watch. Still, I’ll definitely contact you for more smashfests and brouhaha in ABQ. Otherwise, thank you for the support during the tournament. I know you whispered a lot of advice to me during my matches, especially with not being greedy.
Rahul – Thanks for making the effort to come to an OOS tourney. Is this your first one? Anyways, I know I don’t contact you very often when we smash, but I’ll make it a priority to do so. In fact, there’s one going on at Nolan’s as I post this :X I hope you had fun with whatever other stuff you did (girlfriend/family?) on the trip.
Ronald – Just know that if I was a panelist for the NM rankings, I’d put you above Paul, Steven, and August because you managed to show up
On a more serious note, you served as a good escape tool to get away from the stresses of the tournament. I enjoyed our friendlies and I liked how much you admired my falcon in tournament. I heard what you said: “He double jumped to sweetspot that knee OH MY GOD!” We’ll practice together soon, k?
Paul – You fuc
ked up.
Steven – You fuc
ked up.
August – You fuc
ked up. The most.
Las Cruces – F
uck you.
2D Fighter Community – It was fun watching you guys between matches.
The Brawlers I didn't give shoutouts to – Play melee.
THE GUY THAT MADE THIS ALL HAPPEN
Webster – I had to save the best for last, right
Thank you for being the quintessential bad*** – a tournament host, a Tekken champion, and a black guy that isn’t a criminal (jk jk that was rude. The twins are infecting me with their racist bull****). Seriously though, I can’t believe that you had the patience to tolerate their offensive remarks for hours on end. You also were quite the tolerant tournament host, allowing us to run around the venue, bring our own food and drinks inside, conduct and record our matches our own way, self-report, goof off in our photos, and most importantly, have fun. It was one of the best tournaments I’ve ever attended.