The Botanical Gardens of the Mushroom Kingdom

Dark.Pch said:

I got a restraining order for NYC for something that happened. ****ing pissed as hell right now. This is why I ****ing hate people.

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LoliLovesRain said:

Pretty sure you don't get arrested any time you go near boobs. I met you and I'm not a male and no cops were there o.o u probably tried putting ur penis somewhere

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Dark.Pch said:

I was at the mall checking out some stuff and seeing if I can meet a girl. I went to the pizza place and got some food. I look to my right and I see this person sitting 2 tables away. I'm checking the person out. And then I say to myself. "is that a male or female?"

I tried looking at the humans shirt. But the way the shirt was, I could not tell if they had boobies. Now I was a lil afraid cause if this was a dude, this would make me like gay since I found this human atractive. My manhood was on the line. But if this was indeed a woman I would talk to them and ask them out.

Now I am usually shy when it comes to girls (could explain why I am single) But people always tell me to have confidence in my self. and that I am good looking/Hawt. Girls (and guys too *twitch*). So I it was time to test myself. Time to be a man. belive within the inner Pch.

So after working up my nerves, I went over to that person while thewy went to throw out thier trash. I was still shaking to talk to the person due to me being shy. I was a lil nervous. But I could not let this person get away if they were indeed the one. So since I was afraid to speak, I had to use another method to start a talk.

So I went behind the human and groped their chest. In doing so I was thinking, If this is a guy, I am officially gay. So much was on the line. Sweat drops running down. Legs shaking. After about 5 secs I noticed something. I felt these 2 small lumps in my hands. Now I could not tell what they were excatly. Cause some guys have build chest that kinda feel like boobs. So I felt around some more. Expanding my hands some more. The lump expanded as well. Then hit hit me. This person had small boonies. Flatchested as some might say.

But I was overjoyed. I still had my manhood. I was still as straight as bill clinton. The female looked back and kicked me in the nutz. I fell to the floor.Then got security. I was later interviewd by the police for sexual harassment. I'l tell you right now, they way that gurl looked, she enjoyed that moment and was the only bit of sexual action she has ever gotten. Yet she calls the cops one me. Hope that woman caught her period after she left the mall.

The cops checked out my record and noticed my big file charges dealing with boobies. So they but a restaning order on me. if I come within 5 feet of breast, I go to jail. Like seriously? What kind of BS is that. This **** is not justice at all. I know my damm rights. FML........

*shakes head in shame*

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ADHD said:

So does being gay make you have to be a who.re?

Because everyone I've been attracted to only wanted to have sex and the ones that wanted to date were too passive. Lol peach boards.

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Dark.Pch said:

**** like this is the reason I am happy to be straight. Straight guys don't gotta go through that.

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Dark.Pch said:

I was at the mall checking out some stuff and seeing if I can meet a girl. I went to the pizza place and got some food. I look to my right and I see this person sitting 2 tables away. I'm checking the person out. And then I say to myself. "is that a male or female?"

I tried looking at the humans shirt. But the way the shirt was, I could not tell if they had boobies. Now I was a lil afraid cause if this was a dude, this would make me like gay since I found this human atractive. My manhood was on the line. But if this was indeed a woman I would talk to them and ask them out.

Now I am usually shy when it comes to girls (could explain why I am single) But people always tell me to have confidence in my self. and that I am good looking/Hawt. Girls (and guys too *twitch*). So I it was time to test myself. Time to be a man. belive within the inner Pch.

So after working up my nerves, I went over to that person while thewy went to throw out thier trash. I was still shaking to talk to the person due to me being shy. I was a lil nervous. But I could not let this person get away if they were indeed the one. So since I was afraid to speak, I had to use another method to start a talk.

So I went behind the human and groped their chest. In doing so I was thinking, If this is a guy, I am officially gay. So much was on the line. Sweat drops running down. Legs shaking. After about 5 secs I noticed something. I felt these 2 small lumps in my hands. Now I could not tell what they were excatly. Cause some guys have build chest that kinda feel like boobs. So I felt around some more. Expanding my hands some more. The lump expanded as well. Then hit hit me. This person had small boonies. Flatchested as some might say.

But I was overjoyed. I still had my manhood. I was still as straight as bill clinton. The female looked back and kicked me in the nutz. I fell to the floor.Then got security. I was later interviewd by the police for sexual harassment. I'l tell you right now, they way that gurl looked, she enjoyed that moment and was the only bit of sexual action she has ever gotten. Yet she calls the cops one me. Hope that woman caught her period after she left the mall.

The cops checked out my record and noticed my big file charges dealing with boobies. So they but a restaning order on me. if I come within 5 feet of breast, I go to jail. Like seriously? What kind of BS is that. This **** is not justice at all. I know my damm rights. FML........

*shakes head in shame*

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Dark.Pch said:

I was at the mall checking out some stuff and seeing if I can meet a girl. I went to the pizza place and got some food. I look to my right and I see this person sitting 2 tables away. I'm checking the person out. And then I say to myself. "is that a male or female?"

I tried looking at the humans shirt. But the way the shirt was, I could not tell if they had boobies. Now I was a lil afraid cause if this was a dude, this would make me like gay since I found this human atractive. My manhood was on the line. But if this was indeed a woman I would talk to them and ask them out.

Now I am usually shy when it comes to girls (could explain why I am single) But people always tell me to have confidence in my self. and that I am good looking/Hawt. Girls (and guys too *twitch*). So I it was time to test myself. Time to be a man. belive within the inner Pch.

So after working up my nerves, I went over to that person while thewy went to throw out thier trash. I was still shaking to talk to the person due to me being shy. I was a lil nervous. But I could not let this person get away if they were indeed the one. So since I was afraid to speak, I had to use another method to start a talk.

So I went behind the human and groped their chest. In doing so I was thinking, If this is a guy, I am officially gay. So much was on the line. Sweat drops running down. Legs shaking. After about 5 secs I noticed something. I felt these 2 small lumps in my hands. Now I could not tell what they were excatly. Cause some guys have build chest that kinda feel like boobs. So I felt around some more. Expanding my hands some more. The lump expanded as well. Then hit hit me. This person had small boonies. Flatchested as some might say.

But I was overjoyed. I still had my manhood. I was still as straight as bill clinton. The female looked back and kicked me in the nutz. I fell to the floor.Then got security. I was later interviewd by the police for sexual harassment. I'l tell you right now, they way that gurl looked, she enjoyed that moment and was the only bit of sexual action she has ever gotten. Yet she calls the cops one me. Hope that woman caught her period after she left the mall.

The cops checked out my record and noticed my big file charges dealing with boobies. So they but a restaning order on me. if I come within 5 feet of breast, I go to jail. Like seriously? What kind of BS is that. This **** is not justice at all. I know my damm rights. FML........

*shakes head in shame*

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Dark.Pch said:

...........Who the **** are you?

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King Beef said:

Just rocked a 38 year old woman last night. I may never want to go back to younger women after that if I don't have to...it was ****ing fantastic!

/TMI

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Scatz said:

Doesn't matter who I am. What I just read was pretty ridiculous.

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Nordal said:

Not the right time Beefums. Not the right time.

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tofer_booboo said:

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Holy ****.

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Pharaoh.DsY Kyon said:

Why are we so popular here? XD Dark you sure are full of yourself at times

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Dark.Pch said:

Don't hate the writer, hate the pencil.

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