Right, now I should be improvising a speech to a bunch of people who apparently haven’t got better things to do than listen to random strangers.
To immediately start things off interestingly, or at least what is widely regarded as to being sort of a way to get immediate attention, I’ll ask a random male as to the size of his *****. After all, *****es are often apprehended as to being some sort of taboo. You don’t talk about *****es in public, and doing so is viewed as either rude, distasteful or a form of low humor. Rarely one will hear serious talk about *****es. I do say, whether or not I am to be taken seriously is entirely up to the listener. As such, I won’t say I’m in any way an exception to the aforementioned categories of ***** speech: everything I (or anyone else for that matter) say is to be fully interpreted to one’s own liking.
If I am to ask a random male passing by the size of his ***** expecting a full-fledged elaborate answer, odds are to be entirely against my favor. A list of socially acceptable answers would be:
‘No.’
‘Piss off.’
‘Idiot.’
‘What’s wrong with you?’
*silence*
‘Oh the humanity.’
‘Why would I tell you that?’
Oh right, why would you? Well, the answer would be rather straightforward: because you’re kind enough to satisfy my thirst for knowledge. In fact, we’d all agree that in an ideological world, the random male would reply with an entirely sincere counter question:
‘’I’m not quite sure as to which state of my *****’ being you are referring to, is it to be erect?’’
Splendid! Admittedly, the odds of this question being asked in return, as opposed to the more usual replies, are small. Very. The most obvious reason of the treatment this question is ought by society to get, is the pretended fact that the question is rather informal, perhaps even rude.
Why am I rude? Well, prior to this grand world of science, technology and development, we have had quite the few centuries to develop our current system of norms and values. Heavily being influenced by a rather annoying feature-of-life called religion, we decided to regard anything which could be included in a sexual context as to being a taboo. *****es tend to be rather crucial during the more common forms of lovemaking, which is the reason that even to this day, with religion no longer playing a big part in our lives, we still prefer not to talk about them. *****es are private business, ‘s weird to talk about them, right?
Nay, of course not. It’s just one of the many appendixes a male body tends to feature. I could go on making the standard speech about sex and the organs related to the whole matter, but you’re wise enough to know all that. Yes, that speech has, in fact, become so common by now that it’s close to being a cliche. We don’t need that preaching any longer, getting sick of it really. Obviously, that’d mean that most of our population has finally come to its senses and will no longer childishly giggle at the mention of sex organs, turn their head in shame or otherwise respond in a way which would be appropriate in an embarrassing context.
Ain’t it? Why no, we are still conforming ourselves to the ruling norms and values which decide that awkwardness is imperative at times, even when we see no concrete reason to do so. We are ruled by those norms and values, which are culturally decided and pedagogically instilled in our own moral. We have to keep in mind what we can or can’t do, because if we don’t, if we’d uncover what most people would view as something that is, or should be, commonly something one tends to keep secret, society would be able to use the aforementioned ‘secret’ against us.
Oh no, that’d be embarrassing, wouldn’t it? Next thing you know, you’re known to be that weird guy who openly talks about the size of his *****. That’s an image you’d generally want to avoid. Privacy is the illusion of having to keep things to yourself because other people shouldn’t be ought to know. Of course, if you were to ask any one person to specify their reasoning as to why exactly others shouldn’t be ought to know, you’d get a rather vague answer which would relate all sorts of moral standards to one’s own, due to a lack of better terms, freedom of speech.
Of course, those people are rarely actively bothered by the fact they aren’t to be found talking about certain things in public. After all, if they were in fact to talk about those things, they’d feel awkward, awkwardness is not a pleasant thing. Most people prefer not to talk about certain things, and they feel like they make the right choice by making that decision.
Preference is preference, and preference should be respected. That’s what those people tend to say, and I agree with them. However, that social rule should not only pertain to what is referred to as common, but also to preferences which tend to differ from the ‘common social law’. This, however, is not usually put into practice.
Another random question which the audience would rather categorize as comic relief rather than utmost seriousness, to a random female: ‘Darling, would you like to have sex with me?’
‘Crude! Disrespectful! Against all forms of social rulings and decency! One shall not ask a woman to have sex!’ Why, how. I can’t say I did the lady any harm, I simply suggested we’d share a good time. ‘Unacceptable! One first has to become lovers! Casual sex harms our society because of no apparent reason!’ And my favorite: ‘’She’ll say no and you will and should feel ashamed!’’.
What? No I won’t. Odds are she’ll say yes, and my sexual needs would be satisfied. If she says no, I do not believe any harm is done. Of course, most chaps tend to not share my opinion on this matter. Severe damage has been done and I should, really, be ashamed of myself. I have been crude and obviously crudeness equals disrespect. In fact, not only would I have been crude, one could even apprehend me to be perverted. Oh my, perhaps I should feel ashamed indeed! There is no way I’d ever even think of being negatively looked at by people whose social perfection exceeds every level of adherence to our social system I could even imagine to once achieve.
No really, if someone were to think negatively of me simply because I opted to show my erotic desires towards a woman, the simple fact that such an act would cause such grievance to someone already implies that that person is not worth any emotional value whatsoever.
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Then again, why this as a response? I'd figure having spent 2 hours writing a, admittedly random, reply would suffice if the underlying message would simply be:
Dear John,
I miss you too.
Stay classy kid, I know I will.
Good job making me feel melancholic.