ParanoidDrone
Smash Master
You want retro? We got retro. This stage is so retro you could probably play on it from memory, at least if you're old enough to have played the original Donkey Kong in the arcade. (I don't fall under that category. But I did play it in Donkey Kong 64.)
Previously Covered
Skyworld
Flat Zone X
The Great Cave Offensive
Onett
Palutena's Temple
Yoshi's Island
Wily Castle
Gaur Plain
Pyrosphere
Temple
Mario Circuit (Brawl)
Boxing Ring
Port Town Aero Dive
Bridge of Eldin
Pilotwings
Jungle Hijinxs
Wrecking Crew
Halberd
Pokemon Stadium 2
Big Battlefield
Battlefield
Smashville
Lylat Cruise
Castle Siege
Town & City
Duck Hunt
Delfino Plaza
Kalos Pokemon League
Mario Galaxy
Coliseum
Gamer
Wii Fit Studio
Kongo Jungle 64
Windy Hill Zone
Luigi's Mansion
Norfair
Orbital Gate Assault
Woolly World
Skyloft
Garden of Hope
Mushroom Kingdom U
Wuhu Island
Mario Circuit
Layout
75M is a faithful recreation of the Donkey Kong arcade game level of the same name, with everything stretched horizontally a bit. Platforms and ladders abound. There are also two sets of elevators: the ones on the left move up and the ones on the right move down. Unlike other moving platforms, the elevators do not have any offscreen presence; the ones moving up spontaneously appear level with the bottom of the stage, while the ones moving down disappear at the same height.
The elevators and all platforms with nothing underneath are solid from above but can be jumped through from below. The rest of the platforms, including the large surface on top where Donkey Kong stands, are standard. The ladders are all completely functional except for the 2 next to Donkey Kong, which do nothing. The stage also has a walkoff in the upper left corner behind Donkey Kong.
Scattered throughout the stage are some of Pauline's items, which players can pick up for 800 points apiece on the ingame scoreboard. This has no effect on the actual match.
Players 1 and 2 start in the lower left corner (where Mario starts in the arcade game) and in the lower right on top of the small ladder. Players 3 and 4 start on the bottom of the zigzag platform pattern and near the top of the same zigzag platform pattern, directly to the right of the second set of elevators. The Omega form floats over a void.
75M has several different hazards: Podoboos, Donkey Kong, and springs.
75M, or, In Which ParanoidDrone Thinks He's Being Clever by Recreating a Retro Game.
The struggle of a Level 1 AI in the contemporary game "Super Smash Bros. for Wii U" calls to mind the difficulty of the original Donkey Kong arcade game in the mind of the viewer. As the player struggled to save Pauline from the clutches of Donkey Kong, so too does the AI Mario struggle to accomplish much of anything. Are our own lives a similar pointless struggle for ephemeral gain? The artist lets the viewer ponder these questions for him- or herself. Digital screenshot, 2015.
Podoboos
Two Podoboos, living fireballs, wander around their territory. They can freely move around on the platforms and use ladders, but cannot cross gaps. As shown in the picture above, one Podoboo patrols the platforms and ladders between the elevators, while another lurks on the far right side. They do not appear to follow players around, instead moving more or less at random.
Podoboos do 10% fire damage on contact.
Donkey Kong
The big man himself waits in his usual spot on the top level, next to the pair of ladders. Most of the time he's desaturated, in the background, and generally harmless. Occasionally, retro SFX from the level start music will play and Donkey Kong will move forward into the stage while lighting up. At this point he forms a hazard that does 20% damage on contact. This also signals the imminent arrival of the springs.
Donkey Kong ponders what once was, Mario cowers in fear, and Peach reflects on how nothing ever truly changes.
Springs
When Donkey Kong thrashes about, he doesn't move but does summon a series of springs that bounce across the top level from the left before falling down once they reach the edge. They do 20% damage on contact.
Players can avoid the springs by positioning themselves underneath the apex of a bounce, but the pattern is inconsistent and prevents one from simply memorizing a safe spot. Similarly, players on Pauline's platform can sometimes avoid the springs if they are above one when it bounces, but other times the bounce carries the spring right into them.
Once they start falling, the springs fall straight down and pass through any and all platforms. The exact location they fall at depends on their bounce pattern and can be basically anywhere from the actual edge to the far side of the stage. The rest of the stage underneath the top surface is safe.
The stage can throw out 1 to 3 springs. The retro bounce SFX is audible before they appear onscreen and can be used to judge if more are coming. Once the last one is gone, Donkey Kong retreats into the background.
Just for the record, it was unbelievably annoying to stage these pictures with an AI involved. So now we get Peach and Donkey Kong staring at the spring like a couple of idiots.
Summary
Previously Covered
Skyworld
Flat Zone X
The Great Cave Offensive
Onett
Palutena's Temple
Yoshi's Island
Wily Castle
Gaur Plain
Pyrosphere
Temple
Mario Circuit (Brawl)
Boxing Ring
Port Town Aero Dive
Bridge of Eldin
Pilotwings
Jungle Hijinxs
Wrecking Crew
Halberd
Pokemon Stadium 2
Big Battlefield
Battlefield
Smashville
Lylat Cruise
Castle Siege
Town & City
Duck Hunt
Delfino Plaza
Kalos Pokemon League
Mario Galaxy
Coliseum
Gamer
Wii Fit Studio
Kongo Jungle 64
Windy Hill Zone
Luigi's Mansion
Norfair
Orbital Gate Assault
Woolly World
Skyloft
Garden of Hope
Mushroom Kingdom U
Wuhu Island
Mario Circuit
Layout
75M is a faithful recreation of the Donkey Kong arcade game level of the same name, with everything stretched horizontally a bit. Platforms and ladders abound. There are also two sets of elevators: the ones on the left move up and the ones on the right move down. Unlike other moving platforms, the elevators do not have any offscreen presence; the ones moving up spontaneously appear level with the bottom of the stage, while the ones moving down disappear at the same height.
The elevators and all platforms with nothing underneath are solid from above but can be jumped through from below. The rest of the platforms, including the large surface on top where Donkey Kong stands, are standard. The ladders are all completely functional except for the 2 next to Donkey Kong, which do nothing. The stage also has a walkoff in the upper left corner behind Donkey Kong.
Scattered throughout the stage are some of Pauline's items, which players can pick up for 800 points apiece on the ingame scoreboard. This has no effect on the actual match.
Players 1 and 2 start in the lower left corner (where Mario starts in the arcade game) and in the lower right on top of the small ladder. Players 3 and 4 start on the bottom of the zigzag platform pattern and near the top of the same zigzag platform pattern, directly to the right of the second set of elevators. The Omega form floats over a void.
75M has several different hazards: Podoboos, Donkey Kong, and springs.
![](http://i.imgur.com/gV69o8u.jpg)
75M, or, In Which ParanoidDrone Thinks He's Being Clever by Recreating a Retro Game.
The struggle of a Level 1 AI in the contemporary game "Super Smash Bros. for Wii U" calls to mind the difficulty of the original Donkey Kong arcade game in the mind of the viewer. As the player struggled to save Pauline from the clutches of Donkey Kong, so too does the AI Mario struggle to accomplish much of anything. Are our own lives a similar pointless struggle for ephemeral gain? The artist lets the viewer ponder these questions for him- or herself. Digital screenshot, 2015.
Podoboos
Two Podoboos, living fireballs, wander around their territory. They can freely move around on the platforms and use ladders, but cannot cross gaps. As shown in the picture above, one Podoboo patrols the platforms and ladders between the elevators, while another lurks on the far right side. They do not appear to follow players around, instead moving more or less at random.
Podoboos do 10% fire damage on contact.
Donkey Kong
The big man himself waits in his usual spot on the top level, next to the pair of ladders. Most of the time he's desaturated, in the background, and generally harmless. Occasionally, retro SFX from the level start music will play and Donkey Kong will move forward into the stage while lighting up. At this point he forms a hazard that does 20% damage on contact. This also signals the imminent arrival of the springs.
![](http://i.imgur.com/MTtdj43.jpg)
Donkey Kong ponders what once was, Mario cowers in fear, and Peach reflects on how nothing ever truly changes.
Springs
When Donkey Kong thrashes about, he doesn't move but does summon a series of springs that bounce across the top level from the left before falling down once they reach the edge. They do 20% damage on contact.
Players can avoid the springs by positioning themselves underneath the apex of a bounce, but the pattern is inconsistent and prevents one from simply memorizing a safe spot. Similarly, players on Pauline's platform can sometimes avoid the springs if they are above one when it bounces, but other times the bounce carries the spring right into them.
Once they start falling, the springs fall straight down and pass through any and all platforms. The exact location they fall at depends on their bounce pattern and can be basically anywhere from the actual edge to the far side of the stage. The rest of the stage underneath the top surface is safe.
The stage can throw out 1 to 3 springs. The retro bounce SFX is audible before they appear onscreen and can be used to judge if more are coming. Once the last one is gone, Donkey Kong retreats into the background.
![](http://i.imgur.com/XAYQ99V.jpg)
Just for the record, it was unbelievably annoying to stage these pictures with an AI involved. So now we get Peach and Donkey Kong staring at the spring like a couple of idiots.
Summary
- Ever play Donkey Kong on the arcade? Then you know this stage already.
- Podoboos do 10% fire damage, can move around platforms and ladders but not gaps.
- Donkey Kong does 20% damage, signalled by retro SFX.
- Springs do 20% damage, only appear when Donkey Kong starts doing his thing.
Last edited: