Every once in a while, about once a week, a friend comes over to play. At first, even though I constantly did misinputs and didn't play like I wanted to, I was super greatful to just play the game without lag. Now, I realise that I'm also part of the problem, because I constantly depend on having to get everything right to do well. I do a lot of random misinputs, like taunt or something else. Whether it is failing a combo or a misinput in disadvantage, it's ridiculous, let alone for someone who has history playing competitive Smash before this.
And it's not even like I'm not putting in the effort, because I definitely put in the energy- my hands hurts most everytime I stop playing, and it's only like 3 hours, at best. I always say this, but it always feels like there's something about this game I'm not grasping. There's so many equations you have to solve at once, and if you don't know it in the middle of a match, you're likely at a disadvantage. From what good players tell me, it's constantly about having a preset gameplan and solved solutions already in your head, which is ridiculous. And people constantly throw the word "labbing" around for literally everything. There's things you just can't train by yourself against a CPU...
This game is very stressful. I don't know if it's my age catching up to me, my reaction speed or what. There's a reason why there are so many more "prodigies" in this game than the past.
I can understand the frustration(s) you have, although it at least sounds like you're gaining some valuable insights on your weaknesses as a player. Being self-aware, holding yourself accountable and then having the ambition to do whatever it takes to shore up those weaknesses to the greatest extent you possibly can as a human being is an exhausting process and thus needs to be managed and balanced well to see consistent success throughout (all of which this advice that's been given to you was intended to help you with). Taking care of your hand and wrist health is also very important if you want to play frequently at a high(er) level.
The game is pretty complex, and improving your understanding can be difficult (especially depending on who you play). I think the hardest thing is how there are so many match ups to be familiar with, that even for very skilled and adaptive players, it's a chore to juggle all that info and subconsciously adjust your mentality and gameplan quite often.
That being said, it makes
complete sense that it's about understanding your main's strengths, weaknesses and game plan as well as general interactions/situations that arise within a match with varied frequencies. There's always something to learn, which is an aspect that I like about Ultimate (granted, I'm now in my late 20s and have only been trying to play more competitively or for player skill improvement since this game released, so I've probably had more room for growth than usual as far as competitive players go).
A last note I'll make is that it's important to identify your end goal with Smash, Ultimate or otherwise: do you want to get on the PGR? Want to be a top player in your local tournament scene or in your state? Or just play your main(s) to the best of your ability while getting as good of results as you can with them? I think it's safe to say that the stress of the game rises or decreases rather proportionately to the kind of goal you have set for yourself.
For example, my life goal is to get through 3 years of hell in law school, graduate, pass the bar and then establish + further a career as an attorney. Naturally, smash is going to take a backseat to this, but I still really enjoy playing the game overall. So when I do play, I've set the goal that I want to improve my overall skill as a player and be the best
main I can be. Sure, a lot of people think he's total trash in Ultimate and/or despise his aura mechanic for comebacks, but I enjoy the movement and playstyle Lucario has to offer
a lot (he's actually very demanding to play well despite the cheese he's capable of; I've learned a lot about the more advanced aspects of this game by playing Luc though). Once the quarantine is finally behind us, I would like to start competing offline in tournaments periodically when/if I have the gaps in time that allow me to focus on the game a bit more, but not expecting much beyond that and plan to just have fun playing the best I can against other people with a character I love. I might encourage you to clarify what you seek to accomplish from Ultimate/Smash so that you'll feel more satisfied as you continue playing the game.