Now the other question is, how do girls get girls? This same advice might not apply for those kinds of relationships. I'm having a tough time, myself.
Well, I don't know exactly what you meant (that's why I usually tell to guys that is better not to try to understand women in their somewhat contradictory ideas and thoughts) but it seems that the idea of having a **** buddy to you is more fun than the idea of having a husband, while the later is possibly more fulfilling for you as a woman (women just love the whole idea of marriage, is like the ultimate dream come true) may not be as fun.
It's more like...I'm a big romantic. I love love and romance and would love to meet some amazing guy and have a fantasy love story. However, it's not limited to that. There have been times that I see a really hot guy and in my head I'm like "**** me now!!!"
I don't like that, though. I'd prefer to not think like that ever.
The good news is that you can have both if you give it a chance with that person, if sex is amazing but there's not much interest in something serious then is possible that love may grow with time (if you give it a chance like I said), if the relationship is very romantic and fullfulling but sex is boring, sex can get better with communication and a little research here and there, either way you can get what you seek, but is not an easy task because it requires a lot of commitment from both parts.
Yeah, there's always the possibility to fix whatever it is. It's not just one or the other, or rather it doesn't have to be.
I realize that being a woman is difficult in this topic, because of the fact that you have to take a big choice when accepting a partner, he may not be the right one, and that might dissapoint you and probably hurt you in the end (I'm guessing that's another big part you prefer the first kind of partners). Is like taking a big risk, and I'm sure you may be asking yourself a lot of questions about the guy inside your head if you're going to commit into something serious with him.
This is also true. If you know that it's just something casual, right from the start, you don't really get hurt easily, and it's also easier to let them down as well. However if you're in a serious relationship, but they turn out to be not that great, in whatever way, it's tougher, at least for me, to end it.
Like I said, as a MAN you should take the lead and make the first move almost always (sometimes the girl is just crazy in love with you at first sight). Do not show her interest or do anything that she doesn't deserve, if she answers you back with something nice like a giggle, smile, whatever then you can keep going at her, you should only reward her when she has a nice/pleasant behavior towards you. Is very simple, if she's interested you'll see that she keeps being nice to you, make a move and try to caress her in some way, find something that you like on her, maybe her earrings (ears), necklace (neck), bracelet (hand), hair w.e touch her there and say that you find it cute and whatnot. I'm personally a very direct guy and I like this approach, and I find that's a pretty good point to start with something more. Also, always look her at her eyes when you're talking to her... always.
This pretty much goes with the stuff I was saying, with just a few differences.
However, there's one big red flag. You have to be able to tell if she's being genuine. Girls are notorious for their fake smiles and laughs. Oskurito's advice here only applies if you can tell the girl is being genuine. A lot of girls exaggerate or completely fake their laugh/smile for one of two reasons. It's either meant maliciously, to trick you (like a succubus!), or it's because they don't want you to feel bad. But that's just human nature. If a guy or girl came up to you and said something they thought was hilarious, but you didn't find funny at all, more often than not you'd fake a laugh just so they feel better. Doesn't mean you're interested in that person.
So you can't JUST go by that.
True, and this is something everyone can work on, usually most girls don't care about muscles (althought they really go crazy about them once the guy is naked though xD) you don't need to look like a huge ripped meathead, just having an athletic and well developed physique is almost always enough for the vast majority of women, the thing is... women are attracted to this types of physiques because they associate them with a strong mate that can protect them, is some naturally programmed stuff into their brain kind of thing, they also simply fall for manliness in the same regard, they of course find many things attractive in our male bodies just like we men find on their female bodies.
Meh, for me I just like how it looks. I don't care if the guy is "strong" or can "protect" me, I just think that having a slightly fit body simply looks better. I don't really care much about the body nor manliness, though, not as much as other things.
The guy I have feelings for right now, for example. He isn't the sexiest guy out there. I can argue that I'm not even that physically attracted to him. Granted, we've been close friends for a while so that helps (Warning: This doesn't help for most girls. Quite the opposite), but I still have such strong feelings for him nonetheless, because we're almost like a perfect match for each other, as selfish as it is for me to say that. It's like those two characters in a TV show who everyone feels would be perfect and should be together.
So, at least for me, that is enough to make me fall for him. Much more than any amount of manliness or "alpha male"-ness would ever do for me.
To get a good body all you have to do is get your *** off the couch and start going to the gym, it'll raise your chances of success at getting the girl you want, and who knows, you might meet a girl there too. As for talking, I'm sure there are tons of stuff that you can learn on the internet, apply them and see what works and what doesn't.
This, so much this. One of my other close friends goes to the gym every day, and he's been telling me about all the cute girls he sees there. He talks to them some time, but he's more focused on actually exercising than getting to know the girls. Point is, the opportunity is there. You'll meet some fine ladies. Even if you don't see physical results in your body, just the fact that you're at the gym and doing something to take care of yourself, and for the girls there to see that, is enough.
Yes, don't cry because you didn't get the first girl you put your eyes on, like they say... there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Very much so. And love can come from the most unlikely of encounters, so keep that in mind.
Making yourself look good doesn't just mean you have to go out to the gym and get yourself ripped or whatever (not to discourage anyone, by all means lol). Something as simple as changing your wardrobe (i.e. lose the fedora), eating better, or getting a hobby you can express are all great ways to show girls that you can take care of yourself, which means you can take care of them as well. Girls are more keen to guys like this as opposed to those who choose to dress in unfashionable/unexpressive clothes, eat poorly, and don't have any hobbies or interests.
Though, to be some, some guys can really pull off a fedora.
One other thing. Love yourself. As cheesy as it sounds, it's true. If you hate or look down on yourself, and you beat yourself up or even just not caring about being happy, that's not good. You have to have a positive outlook for yourself, and have to care about yourself, because if you don't, why should anyone else?